Posted in EnglishRazor

7: Promises

A nice afternoon to everyone. I’m trying to keep my mind off the problems I have, so I decided to write again. By the way, It’s already July 10, but I only have 7 blog posts. You can’t blame me if I want each of my posts perfect and beautiful.

So, let’s begin.

Why the title? Because I want to share my feelings and ideas about this particular topic, promises.

Honestly, I don’t believe in promises anymore. I myself was a person who tends to break his promises. And I’ve learned from the people who broke their promises to me. Before you make a promise, you have to make sure that you can fulfill it, whatever may happen. But what does the word “promise” really mean?

  • : a statement telling someone that you will definitely do something or that something will definitely happen in the future

  • : an indication of future success or improvement

  • : a reason to expect that something will happen in the future

 According to the Merriam-Webster English Dictionary, a promise is a “statement telling someone that you will definitely do something”. So why do some people still break their promises? Maybe because they don’t have enough guts to follow through with it, or they just thought that fulfilling the promise wasn’t worth it. Or maybe they just couldn’t do it.
And to let you guys know, I don’t make promises anymore. When someone asks me to promise him or her something, I look them in the eye and say “I’m not promising anything. Because I will do it.” So don’t ever make me promise something. I firmly believe that promises, however big, however small, are created to be broken in the end. I won’t have anything to say about those people who keep their promises.
And there you go. Another piece of my head, transferred to my fingers, through the keyboard and onto this post. Well, it’s dinnertime. See you guys later. This is your promising blogger The EnglishRazor, logging off.
(This is a terribly short blog post, by my standards.)
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Posted in EnglishRazor

6: My Best Friend part 2

A pleasant evening, readers. As promised, I will finish the story of my friendship with Kenshin here. Hajimaru desu.

June 1, 2015. Kenshin and I were classmates again in Grade 9, section Burbank. Naturally, we stuck to each other like glue, since I didn’t know much of my classmates yet. During the first few weeks, Shin-nii and I went with Marvin, Hennie, and Patricia, though this little circle of friends will soon evaporate.

As the days progressed, Shin-nii and I grew closer, and we met two new friends: Ariel and Jayzer. These two seemed normal at first, but spend some time with them and you will see their true colors. Jayzer is the most hyperactive person I have ever seen in my life, while Ariel was the weirdest, having a weird style of talking and weird habits. I grew close with them, and we began calling ourselves Triple Trouble (yes, we make trouble). However, Shin-nii and I kept in touch with each other, and all of a sudden-I don’t remember how-we were just best friends. No questions asked, no affirmations made. We just became best friends. During this time, we both had a crush on the same girl in our class, but it didn’t affect our friendship. He got over it pretty quick, to my delight.

On October 28, Shin-nii slept over at my house. It built a solid foundation of trust between my parents and his. And also between us. I’ve also wanted to sleep over at their house, but I haven’t found the time to do so. After the sleepover, Shin-nii and I became inseparable. Partners in pair work, groupmates in group work, and the like.

But like I said, every friendship has rifts. Our second rift was on November 14, the date of the AP play at SM Centerpoint. It was on that day that my best friend and girlfriend got on each others’ bad side. At first, I was forced to choose my girlfriend. Shin-nii left without me, so me and my girlfriend had special time together at Centerpoint.

My best friend never contradicted my relationship, in fact he was supportive of me, even though he didn’t like her, didn’t want her for me. But I didn’t let that small rift grow bigger.

In English under Ms. Estrada, Shin-nii and I always pair up with each other, and our combined works were always top class. There is one creation we have that I can never forget. It’s a poem we made together and recited together. Here it is.

Poetry is Love, Poetry is Life
By Kenshin D. Maehara and Joshua A. Inopiquez

Poetry is love,
Poetry is life,
It flies like a dove
Oh! What a wonderful sight.

Like a majestic mountain
With a dizzying height
Like a flower under the rain
Oh! How it gives me delight.

From its rhymes and chimes,
To read between the lines,
Like a sentinel in the jungle
Overflowing with vines.

Poetry is blank
Like a reflection in the moonlight
While you gaze upon the riverbank
So deep into the night.

Poetry speaks
Poetry feels
Poetry thrives
For it is love and it is life.

We enjoyed each others’ company, we always ate together, did things together, and otherwise did what most best friends do.

But there was one day I never thought would come.

It was March 4, 2016. I was anxiously waiting for my girlfriend to get home, when she sent me a text. To my horror, it was a break-up text. Her parents wanted her to break up with me. I hit the denial stage quickly. I tried to talk some reason into her, but it was no use. Feeling alone and cold, I curled up on my bed, tears streaking down my cheeks. Slowly, my grief turned into anger, and I turned on those whom I believe was responsible for this: my classmates. They’ve always judged our relationship, wanted to know every detail down to the last bit. And to that end, I hated them. Tears blurred my vision as I screamed into the group chat, at people I thought I could trust. In a blur of pure hatred, I coldly pushed Kenshin away, telling him not to talk to me.

But instead of saying “Fine! Do what you want!”, he calmly withdrew and said that he would always be there if I ever needed him. This message sliced through the fog in my mind, and I immediately regretted what I did.

Wait, I’m crying again. I need to calm down for a while.

Okay, I’m good. As I was saying, I regretted lashing out at Kenshin, but I was too hurt to do anything right. I’ve never experienced such crushing pain before. After I had calmed down, it took me a few more hours to stare at myself in the mirror and throw all sorts of insults and curses at myself.

“Useless, good for nothing son of a b*tch. You couldn’t even make her parents accept you. You’re trash. You belong in a garbage can, along with other piles of trash and sh*t. Look at you, so pathetic, even pushing your own best friend away when you needed him most. Ain’t that f*cking stupid? But then, that’s what you are. F*cking stupid.”

I cried some more, then talked to the cool evening wind. Threw a few more insults at myself before finally crying myself to sleep.

Kenshin was one of the first people to get me back up on my feet. He supported me as a big brother would do, and I appreciated it. He cared for me like a brother would. I can’t remember if I cried in his presence, but if I ever did, I’m sure he’d put his arms around me and comfort me.

With his help, I began to live normally again, and the summer vacation began. Kenshin was there on my birthday, when we watched Captain America: Civil War, and whenever I needed him. He never left my side.

Until now, we stay strong together. He didn’t even flinch when he learned I was bi. (Yes, I’m bi. You got a problem with that?) According to him, he doesn’t care if the person is a man, woman, gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. What he cares about is the inside, the personality of the person.

And so my blog post ends. But our friendship will not, as long as we stay together. The EnglishRazor and The Iron Samurai. The bi and the straight. The Filipino and the Japanese. Joshua Andres Inopiquez and Kenshin Diola Maehara. This is your friendly neighborhood blogger The EnglishRazor, logging off.

Posted in EnglishRazor

5: Chibaku Tensei

Hey, it’s me again. I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to write again. This time, I’m continuing a scrapped post from this morning. I was supposed to write something, but I didn’t have the luxury of time.

Hajimaru. So why Chibaku Tensei? First, what is Chibaku Tensei? Translated into English, it roughly means “Heavenly Body Bursting from the Earth”. In Naruto Shippuuden, where I got the term, it means “Planetary Devastation”, with someone requiring the Rinnegan, a rare ocular jutsu, to use it. In the anime, it requires a lot of chakra to use, but the effects are disastrous. You can create a massive satellite or bring down huge meteors onto Earth.

You might be asking, “So? What about it?” Well, I thought about this, and I have come to a conclusion.

In the anime, this technique was used largely in order to subdue the opponent, either by trapping it in the satellite, or crushing it under the meteor. And usually, the user is evil. In the real world, there’s no one around who has the Rinnegan and can make huge floating balls of solid matter, but there are powerful people out there who have the capacity to do the same damage, maybe even more.

I’m talking about nuclear warfare. Nowadays, nuclear energy is used to power millions of homes, establishments and the like. Nuclear energy is taking part in science by creating miniscule amounts of highly dangerous antimatter, which are kept in magnetic containers and in space travel, where the possibility of a nuclear rocket is being researched. It powers submarines, which can now stay under water for months. But, hidden from the eyes of 7 billion people are thousands of nuclear warheads and missiles, hidden in isolated and camoflaged silos around the world. In USA, Russia, Israel, Germany, and several more countries, atomic and possibly hydrogen bombs are secretly kept by the countries’ respective armies.

The US of A pioneered the use of nuclear power, with the very first image of it being a bomb. The Manhattan Project, approved by the late US President Franklin D. Roosevelt and based on Einstein’s theory of relativity, was started in order to put a stop to the unstoppable Japanese forces that were spreading across Southeast Asia like wildfire. In 1945, two atom bombs were dropped on the Japanese cities of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Immediately afterwards, the Emperor of Japan raised the white flag. But the end of the Second World War gave rise to the Nuclear Arms Race, more commonly known as the Cold War between USA and Soviet Union. I better stop here, lest this thing turns into a history article.

Nuclear energy can work two ways: either nuclear fusion (which is the Sun’s specialty), or nuclear fission (a weaker version that humans were able to create). I’m not going to elaborate on those because this might turn into a science article this time, but I can quickly explain the principle of both. In nuclear fusion, intense pressure makes hydrogen atoms collide, merging into helium atoms. This fusion process creates a small flash of light and a little heat. Now, imagine billions of hydrogen atoms doing this process, nonstop, in the core of the sun. Nuclear fission works the other way around. Heavier atoms like uranium and plutonium are hit with a lone neutron, and the atoms are shattered in two. These in turn smash other atoms. The smashing gives off a little light and heat as well, only weaker. (This is the shortest I can make it.)

My point here is not to let you know that USA and Russia almost had a nuclear war, or that hydrogen bombs, many times stronger than atomic bombs, are being tested on uninhabited islands in the Pacific. The point here is: the continued use of nuclear energy can result in earth-shattering consequences. I’m not saying that we should abandon the use of nuclear energy. All I am saying is: the current laws and prohibitions the United Nations have in using nuclear energy is insufficient.

A worse case: what if terrorists get their hands on at least a pound of uranium? A nuclear terrorist attack is not on the same scale as normal terrorist attacks. Not just a house, a vehicle, or a small community-a nuclear terrorist attack can lay waste to an entire city.

And in the future, there is a possibility of a full-scale nuclear war between powerful countries. Multiple nuclear missiles raining down on both sides, atomic and hydrogen bombs falling on major cities around the world… and the small, Third and Fourth world countries will get caught in the crossfire. The combined radiation from all the usage of nuclear weapons will ultimately result in human extinction. Earth will become a barren planet filled with images of destruction and death. Hopefully, astronauts will be spared from the armageddon, but radiation from nuclear power takes decades, even centuries to be fully removed. And even then, they will just disperse in the atmosphere. The land, sea and air will be contaminated, and all life on the “Goldilocks” planet will cease. A true Planetary Devastation.

I’m not trying to scare you. Now, before you start packing your things and make a bomb shelter, listen to what I have to say. These are theoretical events; there is no assurance they will really happen. But they will, if we do not do something about those nuclear weapons… and hatred.

In Naruto Shippuuden, Nagato planned to use his Rinnegan to bring peace to the world by harnessing the power of tailed beasts to create a tailed beast weapon that will bring about pain and suffering to the world. Witnessing the death of his close friend Yahiko made him lose his faith in humanity, so he believed that only pain and suffering can teach people. He hoped that the resulting pain will make people afraid and cease fighting, therefore eliminating hatred… for some time. However, Naruto stopped him, telling him that he must have faith in everyone and in him, that the cycle of hatred will be stopped not with violence, but with friendship.

In the same way, hatred among countries can result in war, where they will use their own nuclear weapons to defeat their opponents. However, unlike in Naruto Shippuuden, there is no guarantee that people will learn from pain and suffering. We do not need to stop nuclear energy. We do not need to use violence to force peace. We need a Naruto, someone who believes in the power of love. Someone who believes that love alone can conquer hatred and bring about peace to the world.

That Naruto does not have to be someone who is influential, powerful, famous. You, reader, can be a Naruto in your own little way. (Okay, put down that kunai and stop running like an idiot.) Showing love to your family, your friend, your neighbor… you can help defeat hatred this way. As the saying goes, “love conquers all.” This love does not neccessarily have to be romantic. Unconditional love, the love that does not end, the love you have for your family, friends, is what truly matters. And of course, faith. Love your fellowmen and have faith in them.

And if all else fails… have faith in God. 🙂

Well, that took a lot out of me… this is the first time I wrote something like this. Usually I’d write about myself or my adventures. Writing about nuclear energy and bombs and hatred and love feels new and enlightening. And now it’s deep into the night. 1:55 am. Oh, man… I can’t sleep now.

So, yeah… in the following days, I might write more that are like this. But not before I finish the story of my best friend and our friendship. Well, I should really go and try to have some shuteye now. This is your historical, scientifical and philosophical blogger, The EnglishRazor, logging off. Have a good night, everyone.

Posted in EnglishRazor

4: My Best Friend

A pleasant evening, guys. I know I haven’t been able to write (or type) much, but it’s because I want all my creations, however small, however large, to be close to perfect. I always strive to make sure everything I write is my masterpiece, something I can be proud of. But sometimes, it can’t be helped, especially if under time pressure.

Tonight, I want to tell more about myself. And I decided that my best friend is someone worth telling about, something that is not my masterpiece but someone I am proud of.

His name is Kenshin, better known in the cyber world as The Iron Samurai. Kenshin D. Maehara is a half-Filipino, half-Japanese who has walked the Earth for 15 years, 9 months and 4 days. Like me, he is currently a grade 10 student at Manila Science High School. He was born somewhere in Japan and began his education there, but halfway through he transferred to the Philippines to “learn better English”.

I do not have the liberty of saying much about him, so I guess I’ll stop there. But that doesn’t mean I’m done. In fact, we are just getting started.

We first met officially on June 2, 2014. Both of us were in Grade 8 – Edison, and like every other friends, started out as strangers. Before Grade 8, I thought of him as “the Japanese guy” while he thought of me as “the guy who has a crush on J——“. Who knew that we had the same seat in a certain subject. It was during that subject that I vandalized the chair with my name and her name, along with three hearts. As luck would have it, that was his exact same seat.

Anyway, we weren’t that close early on in Grade 8. I usually hang out with Dominic, Enzo and James. It got harder for me to socialize with him when he became the class president, as he became a sort of terrifying leader. Mrs. Palisoc unknowingly solved that by making us groupmates in APEH. So during the First Quarter, our friendship was thready.

However, as the weeks passed, we grew closer, maybe because we taught him that card game that Dominic and I play. Or maybe because we were fated to be friends.

Then his special day came. Him and a bunch of other classmates were working on the class poster thing. Usually, I’d go home early or play with Dominic, but that day, a strange force compelled me to assist them. With a litle extra help, they finished it earlier than expected. After cleaning up, Kenshin asked me if I could come with him on his birthday. Naturally, I agreed, and along with his mom, we went to Robinsons to have a nice little birthday dinner.

Since that day, we became close friends. I began hanging out with him more often. I’d do my APEH assignments at school to mess a little with him. We began doing things together.

On February 6, 2015, I had my first heartbreak. Kenshin was one of the four people who sat with me and comforted me as I broke down in class. He was there, and I was so thankful for that.

However, rifts form in every friendship. By the end of the school year, he became more busy and agitated because of the extra work the president has to do for clearance. And the lazy me was not cooperating with him. I think he got pissed at me for that, but at that time, I was too lazy to care. On the last day of school, though, he gave me these words: “If I’m still classmates with you next year, I don’t know, man… I don’t know.”

Guess what-he did not know. 9 – Burbank. Where Kenshin and I officially became best friends. But our Grade 9 adventures will be for my next blog post.

It’s twilight hour, everyone, so goodnight. This is your friendly blogger The EnglishRazor, logging off. Konbanwa desu.

Posted in EnglishRazor

3: What if…?

Konbanwa, it’s me again. Even though this is already my third post, I am still somewhat clueless as to how a blog really works, and what are its true uses. For now, I’m going to use it like a friend who will listen to my thoughts and stories. A fake friend, though, since real friends tend to get bored when the story gets too long.

Anyway, about the title, I thought about it while I was going home riding a jeep. Whenever I ride a vehicle, my mind tends to fly as fast as the car, unless I have someone else to talk with. So earlier, while absently watching the asphalt whiz by, I wondered, what if this happened, what if this never happened, what if I met this person… what if I never met this person. When the final phrase passed through my mind, I began wondering which person could my subconscious be talking about. As I shifted my gaze from the road to the jeep’s interior, my eyes fell upon a couple, holding each others’ hands warmly and lovingly. Then it hit me-I knew which person my subconscious was referring to.

It was my ex. If you know me to an extent, you’d know who she is.

So, I unchained my thoughts and let them fly around. What if I never met her? What if I went to school late on October 6, 2015? What if I didn’t have a glasses fetish? What if I decided not to talk to Ethan that day? My thoughts ran wilder and wilder as the scenery blurred past. What if I never really met her? Would I have these mixed emotions right now? Would I still be hurt? Would I have ended up with someone else? Would I have a chance with… her?

One by one, I tried to answer each question. If I never met her, most probably I wouldn’t be hurt this much. I wouldn’t have mixed emotions right now. I might even have ended up with someone else. Gosh, I might even have a chance to prove to her that I was here, ready to catch her if ever she grew so tired.

But if I never met her… all those sweet memories would not exist as well. The Centerpoint date. The sweet gestures. The holding hands, the hugs, the kisses, the I love yous, the feeling of soaring like an eagle. And most of all, the feeling of being complete.

But… if I never met her… then maybe I wouldn’t have to play hide-and-seek with her mom. Maybe the Social Studies faculty room won’t look like hell to me. Maybe both of us wouldn’t have to get crushed like a nut to a nutcracker. Maybe I’d still be NGSB. Maybe… I could have… made a move… first.

Damn, I’m crying now. Alright, I gotta wrap this up. When I got off the jeep, I knew that thinking all of these possible outcomes couldn’t possibly change anything. Thoughts cannot turn back the hands of Time. In this universe we live in, aside from gravity and farting, time is one thing we cannot control. However, it can change the way we decide. Maybe next time, I’ll think about every possible outcome that can happen from a certain decision. But doing that would be tedious, so in the end, all we can do is roll with it. This is your writer the EnglishRazor, tearfully logging off. Sayonara.

Posted in EnglishRazor

2: Tears

Konnichiwa, it’s the EnglishRazor again. I’m currently cramming some assignments that were supposed to be done several days ago, but hey, when you’re the God of Cramming, you do what you gotta do, right?

But of course, even while cramming, or “multitasking”, as I like to call it, I still have to make time for my writing. It’s a sort of garbage chute, where I can discard the day’s stressful feelings. Not that everything I did, saw and felt today was garbage. Some were memorable, like that encounter with my ex earlier, but now’s not the time to dig deep into long-term memory.

So, why “Tears”? I was getting to that. Roughly 9 hours ago, we had our third meeting in CWE, or Creative Writing Elective. (Yes, I know some of you insist on shortening it to CreWri, but I like to keep the old times going.) Well, third meeting for me and Cheska. It was Jheroche’s first time, so she was understandably nervous. Not to brag, but I wasn’t nervous at all during the first meeting. I was chill. confident. Too confident, perhaps. I always neglect the fact that I’m not as sharp as my pen name. It’ll take years before I can truly be the EnglishRazor.

I went off the trail. Back to the topic. There were Faraday students with us (and don’t kill me for this, but I felt like I was in a room with god-level people) so it wasn’t too sparse, nor was the room too crowded. It was the “Goldilocks” class. I mean, you know how Goldilocks ate only the porridge that was just right, not too hot or too cold? Yeah.

Anyway, when we settled down, Ms. Pariente, our CWE adviser, gave us our first free-form writing activity. The experience was so new, so alien to me. I mean, write down anything, whatever comes to your mind. Don’t think about it, just write it. Being a person who is used to carefully and painstakingly planning everything that will be written down, I was thrown off-balance. So mustering what confidence I had left, I began weaving together sentences from random words and thoughts. My creation went something like this:

“What? What am I doing? How do you write without thinking? Green leaves, red, my thumb hurts, pens, kerchief… kerchief? Goldfish? What am I writing? What’s going on?”

When we were finished, the expected happened. Ms. Pariente asked us to read our works to the class. As I listened to the others, I felt like hiding under my chair and stay there until the world is dead from nuclear warfare. (Which is so far into the future.) I mean, everyone else’ works were so polished, so perfect. And mine was trash compared to them.

While a girl from Faraday was reading her work, she began crying. I felt really shy, because to me, seeing a person cry is like seeing something you’re not supposed to see. Maybe that was why most people cry in private. Then later on, while telling everyone about her favorite books, another girl teared up too. At that point I wanted to rip myself apart because seeing people cry, it makes me feel like I’m emotionless, heartless. Especially if the one crying was a boy. (Hello, Jayzer. xD)

This scene made me think what CWE really meant. According to Shin-nii, or The Iron Samurai (I find his account name hilarious for some reason), CWE stands for Crying and Writing Elective. Well… in writing, you do express yourself in a way no other activity can, so sometimes powerful emotions can be released.

Well, it’s twilight hour now, so I must take my leave. This is your crybaby writer EnglishRazor, logging off. Jaa ne, minna.

 

 

 

Posted in EnglishRazor

1: Me

Hey there, people… nice to meet you all. As this is my first blog post, I decided that you guys should know something about me first. I mean, that is usually the first thing you do when you meet someone you don’t know. You introduce yourself.

My name is Joshua Inopiquez. I have walked this lump of rock we call Earth for 16 years, 2 months, 4 days, 15 hours, one minute and 26 seconds. (These are legit calculations.) As such, I am the eldest of three children, and therefore am the tallest in the family. I live in a particularly busy area in Quiapo, Manila, but I have learned how to cope with the noise, confusion and robbers. (Yes, robbers.) As a Grade 10 student, I have endured 11 years of teachers, classmates, lectures, tests and the like.

As a teenager, you might classify me as “weird”, as how most people would. I watch anime, play cards, hang out with other weird people. But most weird people, from my point of view, are quite antisocial, or if they’re not, they have few friends. I am the complete opposite. For me, friends are the one people that will never be gone from your life. Family? They’ll grow up and have families of their own. Lover? It’s quite rare to have a perfect relationship, ya know. But friends? They will always be there, in every nook and cranny, albeit in different forms.

If you’re asking if I am popular with girls (I’m pretty sure you’re not), the answer is… no. I’m not handsome like some other guys, nor do I have charisma. I’m not even tall, by guy standards. But under all the outside imperfections is a heart of diamond. (Because gold is too mainsteam.) That does not mean I have a hard heart, it means I’m kind. Very, if I may add. You don’t believe? Test me out. My patience is longer than the distance between the sun and Earth (that’s 93 million miles). I try to help out people whenever I can. (Not all the time.) And it’s hard for me to get angry at someone. No, really. I tend to “put myself in someone else’s shoes” before I perform an action.

Also, not to brag, but I am a gentleman, most people just don’t see me do gentleman-like stuff.

Well, I guess that’s enough about me. I wouldn’t want people to know too much about me. By the way… now I’ve been on Earth for 16 years, 2 months, 4 days, 15 hours, 19 minutes and 5 seconds. (Such calculations.) This is your noob blogger EnglishRazor, logging off. Jaa ne.